I’m going to break the taboo. I’m going to share the secret (shhh!) of LIFE!
If you want the short version, just scroll down to the image and use that as profound, and out-of-context, wisdom to cling to this week.
Amongst my diverse careers, from hand model, to Princess walker and slave, to squirrel chaser, one day I found myself in the employ of a five-inch pirate who demanded I make him a new hat.
Now, my millinery skills are well-known among the twelve-and-under crowd, but that is age, not inches.
My response was, of course, “Squee, I would love to work for a pirate!”
Captain Baaa Humbug’s response was, “Squee again, girly, and I’ll make you build a plank!”
I have recently wanted to build a plank. Unfortunately, I do not have access to a moat, a pond, nor even a puddle.
Instead, I tried my hand at making this mini-terror of the seven seas a new hat.
And it was pretty icky. I tried to embellish the skull and crossbones by drawing eyes on the skull.
Never draw on a pirate’s skull. Er, or on his hat.
Because next week I will be turning the scrap wood in the backyard into a plank-to-nowhere.
Here is today’s out-of-context words of wisdom. Please remember them the next time you reach a point in your life where it is time to make a career change.
Please chant this to yourself while you sift through job search boards.
As you chant this on the subway tomorrow morning, beware that the other passengers may mistake you as a very wise guru, and this may lead you to an illustrious career as a lama (or a llama caretaker).
night,
dawn
Mine Own Oxymoron 